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As per the present functionality of the Salesforce Stage of Information Server, for a Parent-Child Relation, the Child Record can be upserted using either the External ID of the Parent Object or the ID of Parent Object.
For example, for an object "PARENT", for one record we have the fields "ID" as "a2s2G000004FnRkQAK" and the "External ID" as "ExtPARENT00001", then we can load data into the Child Object, for example "CHILD01" using either the "ID" field or the "External ID" of the Parent Object
The record can be loaded into the Child Object (CHILD01) with the data and metadata as follows
(a) "ExtIDCHILD0001"( External ID CHILD01), "John" (Name CHILD01),"a2s2G000004FnRkQAK" (ID - PARENT)"
or
(b) "ExtIDCHILD0001"( External ID CHILD01), "John" (Name CHILD01),"ExtPARENT00001" (External ID - PARENT)"
The example (b) as mentioned above must meet your requirement as I understand. If not, please let us know what is required